And the winner is......

And the winner is.....

Thanks to all who voted.  I think it's a quote that is significant to the book. Your help is much appreciated.

“Any advice for those out there struggling with their sexuality?”  I asked my guest.

“Sexuality is an important part of life, but not the most important. Be known for your accomplishments, not your preferences.”

Burger King Proud Whopper

Help

Help

I'm asking for your help.  I've posted a poll on my home page asking you to vote for the blurb you like best.

The blurb will go on the back cover of my book The Gay Detective. The reason I'm asking is I don't know which one is the most interesting or the one that will get readers to want to read the book.

Your vote will help me determine which one to use on the cover.

There will be giveaways as time gets closer but your help now will be much appreciated.

Thanks.

Stop Complaining

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

How to Stop Complaining and Live a Happier LIfe

I came across this article in Fast Company about the Complaint/Restraint project. In an attempt to create more positive lives, Thierry Blancpain and Pieter Pelgrims agreed to stop complaining entirely for one full month.

According to the article, studies show that during the course of an average conversation people complain every minute. I have to admit this made me a little sick to my stomach. Complainers absolutely drive me crazy and yet somehow I begrudgingly think that I'm probably right up there with the worst of them.

If you do decide to read the article please read the Q&A that follows. I think that's the most interesting piece of it. In that you'll see how Thierry and Pieter handled negativity by turning complaints into solutions. So, instead of complaining that there is yet another snowstorm headed our way you could say, "well there's another snowstorm coming, but at least I'll get my exercise by shoveling."

Or instead of complaining that your publisher canceled your series you could try, "well, my publisher canceled my series, but now it gives me time to explore some of these other ideas I've been excited about."

I think the idea is that it's okay to be unhappy about things, but instead of always complaining you'll find you're happier overall if you find the positive in the negative.

I'll admit, the whole idea of a month, heck even a day, of not complaining stresses me out. It even makes me want to complain, but I think I'm going to give it a try. I'm not going to commit to any given time period, but I am going to be more conscious of what I say and how positive I can be and if I do feel I have something legitimate to complain about I'm going to try to find positive aspects so that my conversation about it takes on a different life.

--j

Writing

The most important part of your book is the writing. Your goal should be to write the best book you can write.  If you are writing  to make a million dollars by appearing on Oprah, finalizing a movie option, or get agents,  I'd say stop right now and find something else to do.

Writing is work. Sometimes it's enjoyable and many times it is painful and tedious. I never expected to make a lot of money on my book and the more blogs, tweets, and tumbles I see, most authors agree on that one. Often you want to scream when the right word or sentence won't come out.
Persist or just move on. It will come in the next draft.

Everyone is different when it comes down to the actual writing.  Some believe in a certain number of hours per day whether morning, afternoon, or evening. Others do it whenever they because of their schedule. I myself prefer to set 3-4 hours a day and try tostick to it. Nathan Bransford gives some tips on writing on his blog and in his book, How to Write a Novel: 47 Rules for Writing a Stupendously Awesome Novel That You Will Love Forever!           

I tend to also be obsessive (good and bad trait) and become a hermit and anti-social. This too, I hear is not unusual. The answer to this is balance, but to be honest, I haven't been able to do that. I think it's a good idea to force yourself to go for a walk, exercise, see a movie with friends.

Whatever you do, don't get to the point that you become like our friend Jack in The Shining.


The point of this post is that there are many ways and tools out there to help you focus. Mary Jaksch, of Write To Done, also suggests some apps.  No one else can actually write the book except you, but there are authors and friends out there who do give tips to help you stay writing. Read and heed. Experience is the best teacher.

Dolce & Gabbana Controversy

Hold the phone! Why was Elton John spotted carrying a Dolce & Gabbana bag in the middle of a boycott HE started?! http://goo.gl/5ndLSQ